From a friend;....
I proudly wore my MAGA hat to the dinner table this afternoon and Mother told me to remove it. I immediately accused her of sympathizing with the Communist Chinese, which inspired my father to pop off about 'respect' and I asked him to produce his Voter Registration card as I waved mine under his nose and asked how long he had been colluding with Antifa.
My uncle began blathering about 'discipline' at which point I stood up and read sections 1 and 2 of the Insurrection Act and showed him the legal envelope I addressed to the DHS with his entire political biography enclosed, including known contributions to the HRC and ACLU, logistics support units of American subversion. The ranting over each other caused my niece to began wailing, and I had to remind her that Santa does not deliver toys to traitorous enemies of the state and that she would likely spend the new year being groped by fellow detainees at Guantanamo Bay before shanked and left bleeding at the bottom of a six-by-eleven foot cell next to a stainless steel toilet while Cuban rats defecated on her face.
As my aunt demanded my expulsion from the dinner over all the screaming, I pulled out my phone and began playing the Star Spangled Banner while I read my pocket Declaration of Independence standing on my chair, unbuttoning my shirt to reveal my American flag t-shirt beneath. Everyone had left by the time I got to the "a long train of abuses and usurpations" at which point I took a drumstick, a bowl of mashed potatoes and the relish to my room, opened my window and began blasting "Sousa's Stars & Stripes Forever" to the neighbors. Someone is banging on my dead-bolted bedroom door, but I'm in the middle of posting and dipping gravy, and my right to the pursuit of life, liberty and in particular, this pumpkin pie.
I proudly wore my MAGA hat to the dinner table this afternoon and Mother told me to remove it. I immediately accused her of sympathizing with the Communist Chinese, which inspired my father to pop off about 'respect' and I asked him to produce his Voter Registration card as I waved mine under his nose and asked how long he had been colluding with Antifa.
My uncle began blathering about 'discipline' at which point I stood up and read sections 1 and 2 of the Insurrection Act and showed him the legal envelope I addressed to the DHS with his entire political biography enclosed, including known contributions to the HRC and ACLU, logistics support units of American subversion. The ranting over each other caused my niece to began wailing, and I had to remind her that Santa does not deliver toys to traitorous enemies of the state and that she would likely spend the new year being groped by fellow detainees at Guantanamo Bay before shanked and left bleeding at the bottom of a six-by-eleven foot cell next to a stainless steel toilet while Cuban rats defecated on her face.
As my aunt demanded my expulsion from the dinner over all the screaming, I pulled out my phone and began playing the Star Spangled Banner while I read my pocket Declaration of Independence standing on my chair, unbuttoning my shirt to reveal my American flag t-shirt beneath. Everyone had left by the time I got to the "a long train of abuses and usurpations" at which point I took a drumstick, a bowl of mashed potatoes and the relish to my room, opened my window and began blasting "Sousa's Stars & Stripes Forever" to the neighbors. Someone is banging on my dead-bolted bedroom door, but I'm in the middle of posting and dipping gravy, and my right to the pursuit of life, liberty and in particular, this pumpkin pie.
